by Tomer Moked
Tel Aviv has been labeled one of the Top 5 Gay-Friendly cities in the world. The Boston Globe declared it as “The gayest city on earth.” It amazes me how a city in the only Jewish state in the world has established this success. The last gay bar in Tel Aviv closed a few years ago, proving that the city does not need an allocated space for gay individuals. When walking around town, you can see that most business raise the gay flag in support of the community.
Israel embraces diversity in its non-stop city. I am not only talking about parties and parades; yes, we have those too, but I am referring to family life, same-gender parents, and the pursuit for normalization and acceptance. Celebrating liberal life in a religious state is one of the prominent brandings of Tel Aviv. Dana International, the first mainstream transgender individual in Israel, won the Eurovision Contest in 1998 and has paved the way for a generation of young adults who learned that being different does not always hinder one’s success and influence on society.
It is not that Jerusalem doesn’t have a gay scene, it does. The organization Jerusalem Open House for Pride and Tolerance is fighting for LGBTQ+ rights and embracing the community in an Ultra-Orthodox, Muslim and Christian environment. Tel Aviv has become more of a refuge. A refuge for young people who are escaping the suburbs and looking to establish themselves, a refuge for Palestinians who would be prosecuted and unsafe anywhere else, a refuge for gay parents support groups, and a refuge for artists and performers. A metropolitan area, in what used to be a desert, is now one of the most toured and welcoming places in the world. One can only hope that the state of Israel will pass a law to allow gay marriage and surrogacy for gay couples in the next couple of years with the new government.
My story starts in 1979. I was raised in Holon, Israel, until my parents decided to buy a house and move to Beit Arye, a community town in the Midwest of Israel. After my service in the IDF, in the year 2000, I spent three years in Ramat Gan, a Tel Aviv suburb, where I attended college. It was around this time that I finally felt safe enough to come out as gay to my friends and family. Looking back, I always knew I was gay, but, for a teen in the 90’s, coming out was not as common or as accepted as it is today. I found that being closer to Tel Aviv, and getting out of my bubble, allowed me to really define my personality and to feel comfortable in my own skin.